regarding work

i'm in a really bad mood. i guess i seem to be in a bad mood a lot lately. but it appears to get worse each and every day.

i'm starting to be let down by people.

dimples has cheered up a lot. i know she's under a lot of stress, and while she's still stressed out, her demeanor has lightened up quite a bit. it's nice to see that positivity and cheerfulness come out of her. i hate to see her all down. . . .

other people, though. i am seriously getting sick of a lot of people i know -- at work, in my family, my friends. i can't stand them. 90% of all the people in the world are selfish, self-indulgent, judgmental, smug, and full of bullshit. what's sad is that this same 90% believe so fervently that they are anything but. they believe themselves to be pure, unjudging, and giving.

my ass.

and i can't take it! i can't deal with it. if there is such a thing as escape from civilization forever and always, i wish i would've been able to find it by now. i know it's great that i still have a job, and not only that, i have a job where everyone loves me and wants me to be a part of them. but where is that line between enjoying your job and co-workers and giving up your soul and biting your tongue just to maintain political correctness?

even though i am so good at playing the game, it does catch up with me. there are times when i really hate it, hate what i've become, hate that people expect me to continue to play at it, hate that they take me for granted; at the same time, they continue their own farce of lying, playing politics, playing me, using me, publishing all my personal business to the rest of the goddamn office.

are you kidding me? is there no sense of decency?

in my perfect world, in the work-place, people would be there for each other, be kind to each other, be honest with each other, and give each other space. there wouldn't be any nosying around in each other's business, interfering with other people's business, giving any smug, unwanted advice. the support staff would be there to do just that, support other staff; and the managers would do what they're supposed to do -- manage the work, not manage the personal lives of their staff.

i guess this post is my way of saying --

fuck the idiots. fuck the know-it-alls. fuck the posers who think they're the shit but don't really know shit. fuck those who pass judgment on me but don't bother looking in the mirror. and fuck those who whine and complain for only the sake of whining and complaining.

i'm sick of it. i'm over it. i'd like to move on to a new game -- a game of working to accomplish the greater good that we're supposed to be working towards and also a game of working together. peaceably. if not because we want to, then at least because we have to.

because it's our job.